Prophetic Patriarchy

How time flies! It's hard to believe that my last post was in July of last year! During this time, I have been meditating on many different theological issues. The most pressing and enthralling for me has been the issue of fatherhood as the Bible defines it. Recently, in preparation for a sermon that I hope to preach on Father's Day, I have been able to clarify some of my thoughts on this issue.
Fatherhood is something that is quite misunderstood in our culture. Because of the "revolutions" of the 1960's, fatherhood has been stripped down to its most vulgar expression. Any man who provides the necessary genetic material to create a child is a father. This is an unfortunate understanding of fatherhood because it has effectively destroyed manhood and crippled the next generation of men. If my responsibility as a father is limited strictly to the creation of a child, then what possible reason do I have to raise that child? Raising the child will in no way make me more "fatherly," so why go through the suffering and frustration?
Unfortunately, many "men" (I use the term loosely) in this generation believe this to be the case. They have "fathered" children without any accompanying responsibility except paying child support (which is a politically incorrect thing to require of a "father" if you think about it).
Here is a challenging thought: Any thirteen year old boy can father a child, but it takes a godly man to be a father to a child!
Look up the topic "father" in the International Standard Bible Encyclopaedia and you will find these words, “He loves; commands; instructs; guides, encourages, warns; trains; rebukes; restrains; punishes; chastens; nourishes; delights in his son, and in his son’s wisdom; is deeply pained by his folly; he is considerate of his children’s needs and requests; considerate of their burdens, or sins; tenderly familiar; considerately self-restrained; having in view the highest ends; pitiful; the last human friend (but one) to desert the child.” Crannell, Philip Wendell. "Father", International Standard Bible Encyclopaedia. Edited by James Orr. Blue Letter Bible. 1913. 5 May 2003 30 Jan 2012. http://www.blueletterbible.org/search/Dictionary/viewTopic.cfm? type=GetTopic&Topic=Father&DictList=4#ISBE

Looking over that list, it seems almost blasphemous to attribute those responsibilities to a man. When we compare the Bible's standards with the expectations of our culture, surely this is a chauvinistic structure. In fact, patriarchy has been under heavy attack for three generations at least. The result has been weak fathers and no vision for masculinity.
As I read Scripture and meditate on my responsibilities as a father, I see a picture emerge. Three figures hidden by the mist of our culture's lies begin to step forward as representative of a father's responsibilities. The first representative of patriarchy is a prophet.
Depending upon your religious background, you may readily accept this representative or you may raise your eyebrows in question. How does a prophet represent the biblical responsibilities of fatherhood?
Typically, we understand the prophet to be one who speaks of the future. Biblically, prophets told of future events such as the destruction of nations, divine judgement, and the coming of the Messiah. It is important to realize that the ministry of the prophets was not limited to foretelling the future. Nor was foretelling the primary purpose of their ministry. The visions of the future were a platform for the true purpose of the prophet, to speak God's word into the lives of their listeners. Read the Old Testament prophets and you will see this theme: you sinned, because of your sin God will punish you, so repent and be restored. The prophecy (God's punishment is coming) was the platform for the exhortation (repent and be restored). The key for fathers is the message of God. Fathers, like prophets, must instruct their children with God's Word.
This is what Moses declared to the fathers of Israel, "These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on you heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 6:6-9) First, fathers must know the word of God. It is useless to try to teach someone something of which we know nothing. We must study God's Word for ourselves and meditate upon it before we can speak with confidence to our children.
Secondly, we must inculcate our children with the Word of God. This is not simply telling our children, "Well, the Bible says..." This means impressing it upon our children, drilling it into their minds until it saturates their thinking. Foolish is the parent who believes that I only must give the Bible as an option and my child will have to make up their own mind. Your child is bent toward that which is evil. Given their own choice they will choose to rebel against God and reject His Word. It is our responsibility to instruct our children with the truth as though it were the only Truth, because it is!
Thirdly, our lives must be defined by God's Word. Our appearance and our homes must reveal to the world that we belong to God. Our conversations must be saturated with the Truth. Our homes must be decorated with the Truth so that the world cannot miss the point, we are God's! If the world cannot miss it, then our children will not miss it!
Know God's Word. Live God's Word. Teach God's Word.
Fathers are responsible to train their children in righteousness.
Solomon makes this clear, "Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it." (Proverbs 22:6) This is a verse that causes a lot of trouble to teachers because the promise of the verse seems to lie against the reality of what we see happening in Christian families. Interestingly, a better translation may be "Train up a child according to his way, even when he is old he will not depart from it." This speaks to understanding our child's mind and how he learns the best. If we want him to remember something, we need to train him according to his natural ability to learn, whether that be aural, visual, experiential, kinetic, or any of the other learning types that children may have.
The key is training. The picture is that of an apprentice. Before a master trusts the apprentice to do the work, he trains him. The training takes years. First the apprentice watches that master do the work, teaching takes place. Eventually, the master guides the hands of the apprentice as the apprentice does the work, training takes place. Then the master releases the apprentice to do the work under close supervision, correction takes place. Finally, confident in the training of the apprentice, the master leaves the apprentice to do the work alone. This process takes years, but at the end the apprentice becomes the master.
This is a poignant picture of child-rearing. Unfortunately, we do not grasp the training concept in Christian homes. If we want our children to grow in the faith and in knowledge of God, we must first show them and instruct them, then guide them, then observe them and correct them, before we can be certain that they fully grasp the meaning and practice of their faith.
Yet, how many of us would dare claim to be masters of the faith? Jesus makes this striking statement, "A pupil is not above his teacher, but everyone, after he has been fully trained, will be like his teacher." (Luke 6:40) What will my children be like? If I am the one training them, then they will be like me. Am I what I should be? Am I what I want my children to be?
Know God's Word. Live God's Word. Teach God's Word.
Lastly, the prophet reminds us that fathers are responsible to admonish their children to ever greater godliness. Paul, discussing family relationships, makes this statement, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4) This is another key verse in child-rearing and there is a lot of doctrine buried within. I would like to focus on the word translated "instruction". This word means admonition or exhortation. It implies an instruction with a clear warning attached.
The same word is translated "warning" when Paul instructs Titus on church discipline, "Reject a factious man after a first and second warning." (Titus 3:10) While I am not advocating rejecting our children after warning them once or twice, I am showing that the issue is teaching with a clear warning attached.
We do this naturally in physical matters. What parent has not made a statement like, "Don't play in the street or you'll get hit by a car!" "Don't stick your finger in the outlet or you'll get electrocuted!" "Don't play in the rain or you'll catch your death of cold!" Each of these statements are an instruction with a clear warning attached.
How much more important than the physical comfort and well-being of our children is their eternal spiritual well-being? Should we not employ this same strategy in training them toward godliness?
One of the important lessons that we must teach our children is that sin has consequences. From the minor consequences of losing a privilege to the major consequences of losing life, when we sin there are consequences. What a great opportunity then to direct their attention to the love of God in providing a way of escape through the death of Jesus!
The consequence of Sin is a broken relationship with Holy God and an eternal destiny of death in hell. Yet the Holy God, because of His great Love, showed us grace by sending His Son to receive the consequence for us, death on the cross. He who was sinless took our sin upon Himself and paid it in full so that we might be received as sons of God.
This is the first goal of our teaching, training, and exhorting! The second goal builds upon the first, to teach, train, and exhort our children to living a lifestyle worthy of the calling with which they have been called (Ephesians 4:1).
Know God's Word. Live God's Word. Teach God's Word. This is only possible through the power of the indwelling Holy Spirit!